Trust is very important in any relationship. Whether it’s your relationship with your parents, siblings and relatives; relationship with your friends, colleagues and bosses; and especially your relationship with your spouse or partner; without trust you’ve got nothing to build on.
Trust is something that you can earn but once you’ve lost it, you may have to move heaven and earth to regain it; other times, you can never get it back. This is why, under no circumstance, should you do anything to lose someone’s trust in you.
1. Never ever lie. This is the first rule of thumb in gaining someone’s trust. No matter what the situation is, and no matter how small you think the lie is going to be, never ever fall into the temptation of lying – even if the truth will hurt someone you love.
A painful truth is always better than a hurtful lie.
2. Be true to your word at all times. If you say you’re going to do something or be somewhere, don’t back out at the last minute; or worse, cop-out altogether. If you make a promise, don’t break it.
While you may not be able to always keep appointments due to unforeseen circumstances, breaking your word frequently will make you look flaky. Flakiness is something that people can never trust in others.
3. Don’t let the green-eyed monster in. Jealousy and envy aren’t cute. They breed contempt and distrust. If you keep asking where your partner was and who they were with to the point that you appear like a nagger already, this clearly tells them that you don’t trust them.
This in turn may result in the other person losing their trust in you as well.
4. Accept the other person. Whether it’s your boss, partner, friend or family member, remember that you are all individuals with your own good and bad points.
You cannot build trust with someone whom you don’t accept and respect. This doesn’t mean however, that you will turn a blind eye when lying is staring you straight in the face. This just means that as you hope others will cut you some slack, you should likewise do the same.
5. Don’t keep secrets. This doesn’t mean that you will bare your soul to another person. You are entitled to your own privacy. However, if you are asked about something, you should answer truthfully.
If you aren’t ready to talk about it, gently say how you feel and assure the other person that when you’re ready, you will talk. Also give an assurance that the other person need not worry about anything.